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DO ANY OF THESE QUESTIONS RESONATE?Emotional abuse:
• Does your partner call you names or make you feel bad about the way you look? • Does your partner verbally degrade your self-worth by constantly putting you down? Physical abuse: • Has your partner ever pushed, shoved, slapped, pinched, punched or physically hurt you? • Does your partner have a history of using violence with others? Using privilege: • Does your partner always see himself as superior or always right? • Does your partner treat you like you are a possession that can be owned? • Does your partner insist on making all the big decisions? Using coercion and threats: • Does your partner use force or coercion to make you do things against your will? • Has your partner threatened to hurt the children, friends, family members or pets? • Has your partner threatened to report you to Centrelink, Taxation Department, or others? • Has your partner ever threatened to leave you? • Does your partner insist you dress more or less sexually than you want? Social abuse: • Does your partner try to control your contact with your family and friends? • Does your partner need to know where you are constantly? • Does your partner insist that you are always at home, or only let you out of the house if s/he is with you or insist on knowing where you are going? • Does your partner monitor or limit your phone calls, conversations and emails? • Does your partner check the mileage on the car to see if s/he can work out where you have been or who you have seen? Sexual abuse: • Does your partner pressure you to have sex which is unpleasant, pressured or forced? • Does your partner make you do humiliating or degrading things? • Does your partner make you have sex after emotional or physical abuse or when you are sick? Minimising, denying and blaming: • Does your partner blame you for his anger and violence, saying it was your fault? • Does your partner say that you were "asking for it” after physically hitting or abusing you? • Does your partner deny using violence or say it wasn’t that bad? Using intimidation: • Does your partner smash your belongings or break things around the house? • Has your partner ever punched holes in the walls or doors? • Is your partner easily angered and prone to sudden mood swings? • Does your talking to members of the opposite sex result in unfounded jealousy and suspicion that is out of proportion? Economic abuse: • Has your partner taken away your money or controlled how you spend it? • Has your partner refused to pay the household bills, or to give any money towards them? Using the children: • Has your partner told you that you would lose custody or never see the children again? • Does your partner question the children to find out information about you? If you answered 'yes' to any of these questions then Relationship Abuse is happening in your relationship. Regardless of whether physical abuse has occurred or not, you are being abused and your safety could be at risk. You deserve to be treated with respect and to a life free from violence or abuse. If your relationship doesn’t feel right, if you are ever fearful, then seek help, confidential support and information. The checklist above was adapted from the here. |
