Eleanor was told by a judge, just a few weeks earlier, that it was unsafe for her to be within 200 metres of her abuser. Yet a different judge, in the very same court room, then felt it was appropriate for her abuser to be able to directly cross-examine her.

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It goes unrecognized but it exists on an extremely covert level. It happens behind the scenes without anyone even being aware of what the problem is; the real problem. No evidence of it is left behind and no-one has ever been convicted of it yet, in reality, what is termed pernicious abuse which can lead a person into carrying out acts such as covert psychological murder, or perhaps even covert psychological manslaughter - something which is very real, insidious in nature but unfortunately unrecognized and virtually unquestioned.

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The reason for acknowledging the gendered nature of family violence is not to demonise men, to make them feel bad or to say that violence is mostly committed by men. It is simply that we cannot fix a problem unless we identify its source.
There are two main approaches to fixing family violence: services and prevention. Neither of them has a "one size fits all" solution.

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Men killed women in 80% of domestic violence murders in Australia between 2010 and 2014, and about one in three killed a former partner.
A report, published on Thursday by the Australian Domestic and Family Violence Death Review Network, found almost half of those homicides of former female partners occurred within three months of the relationship ending. According to the Domestic Violence Prevention Centre, women attempt to leave an abusive relationship on average between five and seven times before successfully and permanently doing so, and the time when a woman leaves her abusive partner is also when she is in most danger of being harmed.


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