Might you be
                                in an abusive
                                relationship?

Our relationships and families should provide us with the things we all need like love, care and support in a safe environment. But sometimes this is not our experience.

Does your partner, boyfriend or girlfriend, flatmate, carer or a family member:

1. 1.make you feel uncomfortable or afraid?
   
   

2. 2.often put you down, humiliate you, or make you feel worthless?
   
   

3. 3.constantly check up on what you are doing or where you are going?
   
   

4. 4.try to stop you from seeing your own friends or family?
   
   

5. 5.make you feel afraid to disagree or say ‘no’ to them?
   
   

6. 6.constantly accuse you of flirting with others when this isn't true?
   
   

7. 7.tell you how the household finances should be spent, or stop you having any money for yourself?
   
   

8. 8.stop you from having medical assistance?
   
   

9. 9.scare or hurt you by being violent (e.g. hitting, choking, smashing things, locking you in, driving dangerously to frighten you)?
   
   

10. 10.pressure or force you to do sexual things that you don’t want to do?
    
    

11. 11.threaten to hurt you, or to kill themselves if you say you want to end the relationship?
    
    

12. 12.interfere with your online access or access to the phone?
    
    

Does your partner, your boyfriend or girlfriend, your flatmate, your carer, or a family member make you feel:

1. 1.fearful or scared?
   
   

2. 2.anxious?
   
   

3. 3.sick?
   
   

4. 4.numb?
   
   

5. 5.lacking in confidence?
   
   

Do you:

1. 1.have trouble sleeping?
   
   

2. 2.have physical symptoms, such as tense muscles, racing heart beat, weight gain or loss,  breathing difficulties or panic attacks?
   
   

3. 3.tend to be hyper-vigilant?
   
   

4. 4.have trouble concentrating?
   
   

If you answered ‘yes’ to any of the questions above, then it is possible that you are not being treated right or that you are being abused.

If you don't feel safe, respected and cared for,
then something is not right in your relationship.

If you want to talk to someone about these things, counsellors are available on the Domestic Violence Line on 1800 65 64 63

Checklist produced by the Domestic Violence Resource Centre Victoria